How do you find the courage to continue in the most difficult and painful moments of life? Sometimes, it’s not about you finding courage or faith in the midst of devastation, but it’s about courage and faith finding you. In my 2020 Guest Post series, Kim Beaumont shares how her and husband found the courage and strength to live after they received the news every parent fears most. In their pain and grief, loved chased them down and gave them the strength to walk the road ahead.
‘Oh, the overwhelming, never ending reckless love of God. How it chases me down, fights till I’m found, leaves the 99’….
And the song goes on. A song I have sung dozens of times, enjoying it in the moment, but never really thinking much about it. Until last March, when the reality of the Father’s love was all I could hold onto, and even then, I had trouble doing that.
Monday morning at 4:30am I was awoken by my husband staggering to my bedside; uttering this guttural moan that I will never forget. He whispered to me that our son had been killed in a single car accident. A parent’s greatest fear had just become an agonizing reality in our lives.
My world as I knew it had been tipped completely upside down and my living nightmare had begun.
We are ten months into the journey of living life without my son and people are amazed at ‘how well’ we are doing. But just because we carry it well doesn’t mean it’s not heavy. I can keep moving because of who I know my Father in Heaven is…He is good, He is kind and He is LOVE. Even in my darkest of days, when taking a breath is all I can manage, He is there, never leaving me nor forsaking me. His love covers me, draws me in, and gives me the courage to keep moving forward – no matter what the day ahead looks like.
Does that mean the pain is lessened? No. But it does mean, I didn’t have to carry it alone. God’s love for me and for you, dear friend is not just an antidote for pain, or a feel good fuzzy feeling when we sing our favorite song at church. His love is WHO He is! It’s readily available 24/7 and isn’t based on how we feel about life or circumstances.
“God is love.” (1 John 4:8)
Since my son died, God’s love has been demonstrated to me time and time again. He chased me down every moment of every day, even when I didn’t have the energy to acknowledge He was there.
Our family experienced an outpouring of God’s love powerfully over this past year through community. We were immediately surrounded by our biological family, close friends and our church family from all around the world. Cody died in the U.S, while we were in Australia.
Our U.S community and in particular two friends, did EVERYTHING for us. They organized the funeral, dealt with the coroner, met with the funeral director, booked plane tickets and organized a team to come in and clean our house. They stock our fridge and prepared our home for our extended family of ten who were traveling back with us to attend our son’s funeral. Our church helped with the funeral. His college and old high school held memorials and offered counseling for his friends. Community chasing after us is how we had the courage to walk the days, weeks and months ahead.
God’s “heart” print of love flowed through countless people worldwide. When all we wanted to do was hide, curl up and not live, God’s love, through the practical help and support of people reached out to us. Our community chased us and fought for us every step of the way and continues to do so.
“No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us. And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:37-39 NLT)
There are days still, when I don’t really want to be found by anyone; where reality hits me in the face all over again and my heart is heavy with pain. BUT GOD! He continues to pursue me, He continues to love on me through His word and community, and He draws me closer still.
No matter what we’re walking through, no matter what we’re hiding from, His love is always shadowing us. It continues to chase us down; empowering us when we feel too weak or too scared to take that one courageous step.
And the beauty of His love is that He doesn’t just do it for one…His love is for everyone! Even those who don’t want to be found…He chases after them too!
I am completely convinced that overwhelming victory is ours because of WHO our God is. He is love, and His love has the power to carry us, give us courage, and to strengthen us in the most difficult moments of life. When we are lost in pain and grief God’s love chases us down until we are found.
Until Next Time,
Guest Post Series 2020
More about Kim- Mentor, Speaker, Writer, Traveller. Kim is raw and real and not afraid of mess. Turning wounds into wisdom, and life’s obstacles into hope and strength for the journey; Kim empowers people to step into who they are created to be. Learn more about her story and connect with Kim on Instagram @kimlbeaumont. Website currently under re construction.